The Privilege of Living
While God planned the beginning of our lives, only He knows the ending. Yet we have had the privilege of doing the living. At least that’s how I view my life now that I am in my latter years.
I beat cancer six years ago. I was 84 when I discovered the breast lump. Within days I underwent surgery while my former Anglican priest prayed in the waiting room. The doctor said she got it all.
But as a precaution I underwent 33 radiation treatments. I even drove myself to the clinic 15 miles away for each treatment while listening to old familiar hymns on the way.
Six years free of cancer. A survivor!
I wrote three books—Warfare Prayers For Women, co-authored with Ruthanne Garlock for Chosen books. Then Cast Your Shadow: Influence on Purpose and Pondering My Journey At Age 90. I even spoke locally to several women’s Bible study groups on my various book topics.
During the covid pandemic and even after it was over, I used Zoom to teach individuals and groups. For example, I taught Cast Your Shadow to military wives scattered in 20 different homes, and to 15 women meeting together in Birmingham, Alabama.
For three of those years, I mentored a young female college history professor in Ohio—by phone. She got her book published and married a handsome professor at her college during this time—an answer to two of our prayers!
I taught several writing groups—all by computer technology. When two of my long-ago writing students got their books published, I rejoiced that they caught what I taught. I continued to write a new blog for my website each week.
Then I turned 90. Friends came from four different states and surprised me for my birthday by having us spend a weekend in a house so close to the Gulf of Mexico we could hear the waves beat on the white sand beach. A favorite thing I enjoy.
Two months later I coughed up blood. My daughter drove me to the hospital where I was admitted. Later it was determined I had inoperable lung cancer, though I’ve never smoked. I underwent 33 more radiation treatments as friends and family drove me and prayed. This time those treatments exhausted me. But for a while the tumor was shrinking. Then things changed.
It’s been a little over year now and the cancer has become progressively worse. It has spread. I labor to breathe. Hospice nurses can no longer drain the fluid that builds up in my lung area—not through the device doctors implanted within me two months ago because it became too thick. Some days it feels like I am drowning in that fluid. The cancer doctor can offer no more treatments.
Hospice personnel come twice a week to check my vitals and bathe me. I write texts or email letters to relatives and special friends when I have the strength. How I treasure my friendships.
To those I have personally mentored over the years I often shared this Scripture that Paul wrote: “The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you.” (Phil. 4: 9 NKJV)
Another I have kept close in my heart is: “Telling the generation to come the praises of the LORD, And His strength and His wonderful works that He has done.” (Psalm 78:4 NKJV)
I have my “passport to heaven” so to speak. You see, Jesus is my Lord and Savior and He paid the price for my sins. So, I know where I am going after my time on earth is over. Heaven is my destination—but oh the journey is tough, the suffering real, the final good-byes hard. But He will see me through and be with me to welcome me “home” someday.
At times I do a “review” of my life. I believe in my six years of freedom from cancer I finished some of God’s purpose for me—at least I tried. Regrets? Of course, we all have them, don’t we?
But I have reached the ripe old age of 91. This Scripture has been a goal for me:
“O God, You have taught me from my youth; and to this day I declare Your wondrous works.Now also when Iam old and gray-headed, O God, do not forsake me, Until I declare Your strength to this generation, Your power to everyone who is to come.” (Psalm 71:17-18 NKJV)
I hope all who read this also know your final destination is heaven because you know Jesus and His sacrificial redeeming love. I also hope you have thanked the Lord for allowing you to fulfill some of your destiny.
On flyleaf of my Bible:
He that formed me in the womb
He shall guide me to the tomb;
All my times shall ever be
Ordered by His wise decree.
—John Ryland (1753-1825)
Prayer: Lord, we thank You for the privilege of living. And for Jesus dying for our salvation, and for preparing a place for us in heaven. What a special joy that will be—to meet our Savior face to face. Amen.
Scripture:[Jesus] “ Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. And where I go you know, and the way you know… I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” John 14:1-4,6 NKJV)
Comments (0)